You had me at "educational industrial complex." LOL what a hilarious yet nostalgic piece! I think my favorite part is where the piece suddenly becomes a 1960s infomercial with a live studio audience and women who faint at the appropriate time and also a brass orchestra.
As I recall, we had a box of 64 but that was strictly for coloring at home. At school, I had to make due with 8 or 16 like someone from Yankton.
Hope you enjoyed your well-earned sabbatical and I'm also selfishly happy you're back.
Well I was never so happy to see the return of Johnny High Five (NO disassemble!) & am saving your juicy Predator piece for later! I admit to first channeling a little Preacher Boyd, but then it just became a Music Man rip off with some classic Bass-O-Matic in there. I am not very original. But I refuse to go out on the coloring game like a bastard from Yankton. Ordering my ‘64 pack TODAY! 😉
There she is!!! I was waiiitttiingg..😉 Now you have to reread the section in my off-brand Meredith Wilson patter. Gawd, I LOVE that show....great honk 😉
I'll always find a way to infiltrate yours and Eric's comment threads, it's sort of my jam. Especially if you are gonna mention musicals. That's like my Bat signal!
Yes!!! I love new school supplies and have a stash of my own as a single adult without children. Crayola 64? Yes!! I bought myself a pack a few years ago for my adult coloring books, and my Elmo ones too. And let’s not forget how each subject had its own color for folders and Mead Narrow lined notebooks!! Green = Science; Blue = Humanities or History; Yellow = Math; Red = whatever I didn’t like. 😆 Thanks for the walk down memory lane! And what a cute photo of you as little Sheila! ❤️
You are high class!! I’m so happy you splurged on the gold standard for your grown up “back to school” needs! I would do the same! That’s so true on the folders! Like we had 15, but for 4 subjects...but they were all sooo pretttttyyyyy! (She says, clicking on the Amazon link for pencil boxes) 😘
I relate. ! The excerpt from My story Bad Man Jan...
In class, everyone was to get out their crayons and glue for our art project.
All the parents had supplied their kids with crayons and glue as instructed by the newsletter we brought home.
Out came the tower-shaped turn table Crayola Caddies… ( look those beauties up if you don’t know what they are ), the boxes of super nice crayons with built-in sharpeners in the base and silver gold and bronze crayons, and out came the nice white sweet smelling glue in clean white bottles and easily dispensing nozzles.
I got my crayons and glue out… but within a minute… I heard
“Pooooo! What’s that stinky smell!”
“OH gross! It’s HIS glue.”
I looked at my glue … my glue was in a weird gunky snotty glass pot… with the lid on crooked… and a weird old wild bristly brush jammed down into a mostly dried stinking gray mass.
It was most likely made up of mashed-up rotten horse testicles.
The teacher came over… and looked at my glue… then picked up my crayons. My crayons were not the special Crayola ones… my crayons were the four-pack from that greasy Italian restaurant we went to once with my Uncle…
Tiny red, blue, yellow, and green paper-wrapped sticks that drew about as good as a lightly colored candle.
Gently putting down my crayons and looking at me with sad kind eyes, she picked up my glue pot and said “I’m just going to put this outside for now ok, and you can take it home. I have some other spare glue you can use.”
I said nothing… but watched the other kids laughing as they watched her take the glue outside the class.
I looked at my crayons… I looked at the other kid’s crayons… I looked at their glue… I looked at their backpacks over on the wall… I looked at my weird old woman's 70s vinyl handbag…that for some reason I had instead of a backpack.
I had a shattering moment of clarity.
We were as poor as f.
It sort of all lined up suddenly… the weird meals, the fact the other kid’s rooms were filled with toys and I had only a few toys and they were wack toys that were mostly from cracker jack boxes or happy meals.
The Crayola 64!! Deffo the Bugatti of skool supplies as you say. I was obsessed with this time of year. Back to School in the fall is the bestest time. I only want months that end in -ber you know?! All other months can take a hike especially the summer months with their lately non-stop 100+ degree weather.
P.S. I used to work for IBM too like your pops! And I can attest about their solid office supply game. I did use the heck out of their color laser printers as well for my own needs, but my biggest score was a perfectly good abandoned Amazon Fire tablet that one of the geek squad peeps had just left lying around in one of the copy machine rooms. Still use it to this day!
Marmi-I didn’t even get into how fixated I was on the “first day outfit.” VERY important stuff!! Sounds like you scored BIG at IBM! Lucky you! The 80s were not high holy days of office supply coolness. My dad also picked up an early microwave they were getting rid of: it was the size of a damn bank vault. How did any of us survive? 🤣
1st day of skool 'fit was sooo important, too right. Did you have to get a knockoff Swatch as well? As soon as I had my first real job as an adult, I bought myself an orange Swatch, top of the line. Didn't even get the special Swatch guard cuz I was extra careful with my wrist so it wouldn't get scratched. I believe I wore it all throughout my twenties until I graduated to Dooney & Burke watches with real leather straps. God I'm such a slavish sheeple!!
Feel ya on the big microwave thing. They don't make 'em like they used to. I bet it was a trusty Kenmore or Black & Decker! I love brands like LG and Miele but you can't beat appliances from Sears :) They should just make whole airplanes and buildings out of whatever Sears used!
I loved the first day of school and presenting to class mates my new, shiny, magnetic, pencil case. Look! There's a hidden compartment that sldes open! And inside...my word! New pens, pencils and erasers that were super fun but completely useless. The stick on the end of a pencil eraser that squelched and rubbed but created an even bigger mess! Miss those days. My kids don't care for stationary, they simpy want a computer update.
You had me at "educational industrial complex." LOL what a hilarious yet nostalgic piece! I think my favorite part is where the piece suddenly becomes a 1960s infomercial with a live studio audience and women who faint at the appropriate time and also a brass orchestra.
As I recall, we had a box of 64 but that was strictly for coloring at home. At school, I had to make due with 8 or 16 like someone from Yankton.
Hope you enjoyed your well-earned sabbatical and I'm also selfishly happy you're back.
And also: See?! You proved my point with the fancy crayon box for HOME, just like the good China & guest towels. Big Crayon OWES us!!
LMAO! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Well I was never so happy to see the return of Johnny High Five (NO disassemble!) & am saving your juicy Predator piece for later! I admit to first channeling a little Preacher Boyd, but then it just became a Music Man rip off with some classic Bass-O-Matic in there. I am not very original. But I refuse to go out on the coloring game like a bastard from Yankton. Ordering my ‘64 pack TODAY! 😉
Did someone say MUSIC MAN?!!
There she is!!! I was waiiitttiingg..😉 Now you have to reread the section in my off-brand Meredith Wilson patter. Gawd, I LOVE that show....great honk 😉
I'll always find a way to infiltrate yours and Eric's comment threads, it's sort of my jam. Especially if you are gonna mention musicals. That's like my Bat signal!
YAY!!!!!!!! 💥💥💥
“It’s got no bite” says it all. Wow. So great. Lisa Frank. Who is she? Love ya and this xo
Thanks my mighty friend! NO child should have to suffer with the off-brand wax stick. THIS IS NOT COMMUNIST CUBA!!! 😘
Yes!!! I love new school supplies and have a stash of my own as a single adult without children. Crayola 64? Yes!! I bought myself a pack a few years ago for my adult coloring books, and my Elmo ones too. And let’s not forget how each subject had its own color for folders and Mead Narrow lined notebooks!! Green = Science; Blue = Humanities or History; Yellow = Math; Red = whatever I didn’t like. 😆 Thanks for the walk down memory lane! And what a cute photo of you as little Sheila! ❤️
You are high class!! I’m so happy you splurged on the gold standard for your grown up “back to school” needs! I would do the same! That’s so true on the folders! Like we had 15, but for 4 subjects...but they were all sooo pretttttyyyyy! (She says, clicking on the Amazon link for pencil boxes) 😘
I relate. ! The excerpt from My story Bad Man Jan...
In class, everyone was to get out their crayons and glue for our art project.
All the parents had supplied their kids with crayons and glue as instructed by the newsletter we brought home.
Out came the tower-shaped turn table Crayola Caddies… ( look those beauties up if you don’t know what they are ), the boxes of super nice crayons with built-in sharpeners in the base and silver gold and bronze crayons, and out came the nice white sweet smelling glue in clean white bottles and easily dispensing nozzles.
I got my crayons and glue out… but within a minute… I heard
“Pooooo! What’s that stinky smell!”
“OH gross! It’s HIS glue.”
I looked at my glue … my glue was in a weird gunky snotty glass pot… with the lid on crooked… and a weird old wild bristly brush jammed down into a mostly dried stinking gray mass.
It was most likely made up of mashed-up rotten horse testicles.
The teacher came over… and looked at my glue… then picked up my crayons. My crayons were not the special Crayola ones… my crayons were the four-pack from that greasy Italian restaurant we went to once with my Uncle…
Tiny red, blue, yellow, and green paper-wrapped sticks that drew about as good as a lightly colored candle.
Gently putting down my crayons and looking at me with sad kind eyes, she picked up my glue pot and said “I’m just going to put this outside for now ok, and you can take it home. I have some other spare glue you can use.”
I said nothing… but watched the other kids laughing as they watched her take the glue outside the class.
I looked at my crayons… I looked at the other kid’s crayons… I looked at their glue… I looked at their backpacks over on the wall… I looked at my weird old woman's 70s vinyl handbag…that for some reason I had instead of a backpack.
I had a shattering moment of clarity.
We were as poor as f.
It sort of all lined up suddenly… the weird meals, the fact the other kid’s rooms were filled with toys and I had only a few toys and they were wack toys that were mostly from cracker jack boxes or happy meals.
Wow!!! Expertly captured here! I can FEEL this classroom! Crazy how some memories & spaces get grafted onto our DNA. Thanks for sharing this!
First day of school for me as a primary teacher is ace. Fresh looking children with their new lunch bags and greasy hope. Love it.
I bet you are ADORED! And I bet you’d share your ‘64 pack if need be 😉
The Crayola 64!! Deffo the Bugatti of skool supplies as you say. I was obsessed with this time of year. Back to School in the fall is the bestest time. I only want months that end in -ber you know?! All other months can take a hike especially the summer months with their lately non-stop 100+ degree weather.
P.S. I used to work for IBM too like your pops! And I can attest about their solid office supply game. I did use the heck out of their color laser printers as well for my own needs, but my biggest score was a perfectly good abandoned Amazon Fire tablet that one of the geek squad peeps had just left lying around in one of the copy machine rooms. Still use it to this day!
Marmi-I didn’t even get into how fixated I was on the “first day outfit.” VERY important stuff!! Sounds like you scored BIG at IBM! Lucky you! The 80s were not high holy days of office supply coolness. My dad also picked up an early microwave they were getting rid of: it was the size of a damn bank vault. How did any of us survive? 🤣
1st day of skool 'fit was sooo important, too right. Did you have to get a knockoff Swatch as well? As soon as I had my first real job as an adult, I bought myself an orange Swatch, top of the line. Didn't even get the special Swatch guard cuz I was extra careful with my wrist so it wouldn't get scratched. I believe I wore it all throughout my twenties until I graduated to Dooney & Burke watches with real leather straps. God I'm such a slavish sheeple!!
Feel ya on the big microwave thing. They don't make 'em like they used to. I bet it was a trusty Kenmore or Black & Decker! I love brands like LG and Miele but you can't beat appliances from Sears :) They should just make whole airplanes and buildings out of whatever Sears used!
I loved the first day of school and presenting to class mates my new, shiny, magnetic, pencil case. Look! There's a hidden compartment that sldes open! And inside...my word! New pens, pencils and erasers that were super fun but completely useless. The stick on the end of a pencil eraser that squelched and rubbed but created an even bigger mess! Miss those days. My kids don't care for stationary, they simpy want a computer update.