27 Comments
User's avatar
Bill Southern's avatar

I agree with you, Sheila - there's way too much multitasking going on in public bathrooms. I view a visit to a public bathroom as I do a visit to a bank (quaint, right?): Get in there, make the deposit and get out.

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

100%! What are people doing in there? Working on the cure for diabetes?!? The bathroom should work like a pit crew stop at the Indy 500

Michelle Milliken's avatar

I worked at Applebee's in college. I think he'd take them to the cleaners.

Good stuff, as usual!

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

Maybe so, but free waffles for life vs. free queso-jalapeño-poppers for life….? I know what I’d choose!

Sue Cauhape's avatar

And the judge will undoubtedly throw this pig of a lawsuit in the bin and fine the victim and his legal team bundles o' bucks. Let's hope!

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

I have high hopes that justice will prevail for The Waffle House and because of that they will launch the “Judge Wafflner” breakfast special, with unlimited coffee refills of course. Stay tuned! :)

Sue Cauhape's avatar

Ooooh, the saga continues? I can't wait for the cummupence.

Henny Hiemenz's avatar

If you attempt to take a shit at a Waffle House you are taking your life in your own hands. I’ve been to a Waffle House exactly one time in my life and I am aware of this.

Also, I have a college friend who’s a Waffle House big wig. Follow me for free waffles!

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

I am going to call you Mayor McWaffle! Damn the copyright infringement! Agreed about the other thing. This guy was a trucker-sketchy bathroom acumen is a requirement! C’mon!

Diane Roth's avatar

Is it possible that the WH toilet was somehow elevated, like some sort of throne, so that the gentlemen fell from a height? Or maybe he just jumped down from his truck because he thought he was in the toilet! Then he blamed it on WH!

Either way, this is a scam.

I'm so glad you're on it!! 😂😂😂

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

Something doesn’t add up, that’s for sure! Can we blame AI? I would have figured out a way to blame “smart toilets.” Those are things now, right?

Diane Roth's avatar

I'd have blamed AI for it too. That truck driver was not only a scammer, he wasn't even a smart scammer.

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

He really needs to brush up on his grift. Maybe Regime 47 can put him on payroll. He could learn something there

Diane Roth's avatar

So true!! They do grift better than AI!!

Mary Beth Lathrop's avatar

Such talent! I doubt I could pull off a fall from a toilet without the help of some serious intoxicaters. Truly the heavy stuff. So we know this was premeditated--and yet the story he came up with??! It's eminently clear that Mr. Brock is a nuisance law suit rookie. (Points for creativity though, dude. Keep working on it.)

As always, thank you Sheila! (Still smiling through my yucky face--I can't stop picturing that bathroom floor by the time he was finished. So to speak. Pun intended.)

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

Thanks Mary Beth! You know there are easier ways to make early retirement work than a lengthy and embarrassing lawsuit involving the public restroom at a Waffle House. It’s almost like “The Onion, but make it legal stuff.” :)

Francesca Bossert's avatar

No "Loss of consortium"?!! Maybe he forgot that one!

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

That will be in the appeal….100% :)

Francesca Bossert's avatar

Keep us posted!

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

I will not sleep until I know of Waffle Toilet Man’s fate!!!

Brain of J-Hawk (he/him)'s avatar

I’m going with the America’s Next Super Mega Star theory. All of those injuries sound plausible from the actions of clogging in a bathroom stall.

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

I agree! Who among us has not rocked and/or clogged out in a bathroom stall? Exactly. I rest my case.

Brain of J-Hawk (he/him)'s avatar

A lot of bodily harm in various areas can happen with just one wrong direction of a clog.

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

You come for the clog, you best not miss. Just sayin

Brain of J-Hawk (he/him)'s avatar

RIP Michael K.

Sheila Moeschen's avatar

There was no one like him. What a loss. I recently rewatched the first three seasons of The Wire and it is still a masterpiece

Sharron Bassano's avatar

"...Look before you leap, bro." And while you are at it, grow the fuck up.

And - a Waffle House as a prime teleportation portal?! Who even knew this?? Far out.